![]() ![]() ![]() I hated myself, but I was too cowardly to take it back, afraid that everyone would hate me and that I would lose the people I loved. I made up a cause, a funeral, everything. I acted the whole part crying down the phone. To keep up the lie, I told two of my closest friends from college (who are also acquaintances & don't live near me). Through fear of being alone, and to stop him from leaving me, I told my ex-partner that my mother had died. When I was 20, I was diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder & was told that lying was a symptom of impulsivity and fear of abandonment.Ī few years back, I was in a 5-year-long relationship during which I was systematically and routinely cheated on, smacked around and emotionally abused. For many years, it's been second nature to me - a way to get out of trouble, to get sympathy or admiration from others. That isn't to say I don't love her, and we have repaired a lot of damage but she was not a good mother.įor as long as I can remember, I've had a problem with lying. I never had a good relationship with my mom. ![]()
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